abba

there are angels in my life.
the girls from group have been calling and texting and checking in with me all day.
my sweet friend and p.'s sister in law, has been up early and late hours listening to me.
my best friend, is patient with me and is always so dependable and loving.
for those of you that have commented here and expressed love and support.
i'm blessed. you are all angels.


i can't help but think that my situation is how Heavenly Father must feel.
he gives us commandments and boundaries to protect us, to ensure safety and happiness.
and then he sends us to this earth, watches us break those commandments, forget him, mistreat him.
and then he has to watch us walk into that pain.
and walk into the darkness.

and i imagine his heartbreaking just as mine does today, when he has to withdraw his Spirit from us for not living within his boundaries of the gospel. i imagine the tears going down his face for that child that he loves so very much. i know of the helplessness he must feel when he watches us use our agency unwisely.  He has set us up with every opportunity to be successful! he gives us his Spirit, the scriptures, temples, each other! and prayer.

my boundaries too have been lain.
and my heart just burns with so much love for p.
he is a Son of God and a sweet soul.
and i'm just breaking that i have to withdraw from him.

but i have the courage.
I know God is aware of this.
he is aware of my sadness and heartache. and as i show my faith in him, and call on him, he will guide me and strengthen me. i know and believe this wholly.

"And he said, Abba, Father, all things are possible unto thee; take away this cup from me: nevertheless not what I will, but what thou wilt."